Have we met?

Wait?
Don't I know you from somewhere?
No, we've met, I know it!

It was that time we met
on the bus.

Okay, we didn't exactly meet
But I saw you
And, I think you saw me.

It's like two distant radio signals
fighting for the same frequency
from far away
but playing the same tune.
Do they know that they exist?

Or like a VW Beetle
and a Chevy Chevette
World's apart
but driving past each other.
Same size, same shape
but going in their separate ways.

Just a glance
Just a pass
not acknowledging each other.

Yes, I've ssen you before
And, yes, you've seen me.

But no.
I suppose, we've never met.
Hi, I'm Garrett. Can I buy you a coffee? 

TV, Sport!

They're showing sports
up on tv.
Football, soccor,
MLB!

But there's this new one
that I saw
When first I saw it,
I said "wait? nah?"

But there it was
up on the tube
A man appeared
in sales mood

Yes, this must be
some new sports thing.
You try to sell
someone something

The ojbect of the game
it seems
To talk until
you're out of steam

Several shared this new contest
They all talked
and could attest

This new thing
they tried to sell
they acted like
it works quite well

I'm not too sure though,
how they win,
Or when this new
TV sport ends

So I asked the waitress here
What's that new sport
Showing up there?

That's not a sport
You silly mule
Your wantching an
Info-mercial

And then she went
and changed the channel...

Rulers

I'm tired of all of
these stupid dumb rules.
I'm tired of being told
what I can't do.

There's so many rules
that have been made
I feel as though living
is totally forbade.

"You can't do this,"
"I can't do that."
It's enough for me
to go buy a bat!

I'm going to use it
to break all of that.
I'm going to break all these rules
with that bat!

Don't get me wrong
Some laws are good.
Some rules are needed
and that's understood.

But other rules
They get in the way.
They seem to do nothing
but ruin my day!

"You can't smoke this."
And "you can't eat that."
"Don't feed the animals,"
"You must wear a hat!"

Well, I've had enough
Here comes my bat.
I'm breaking some rules
Now, how about that?

Sirens

The loud sirens came
from outside the store
In rushed some medics
There were three
maybe four!

"We got the call"
Said the first one there...
"We came in a hurry
and so we are here!"

We all looked around
and wondered why.
"Did someone call you?
Everything's fine."

He said: "No it isn't
Something is wrong!
We have an emergency
This won't take long!"

So we stood there dumbfounded
There was a long pause
Until, finally,
someone cracked
like a vase

"Well then, what is it?
What can we do?
We just serve coffee
What is it to you?"

"That's why we're here"
The medic did say
"We must have coffee
Can I get a latte?"

What's the word?

What is the funniest
word that you've heard?
Is it "silly"
or
"smelly"
or
"hairy"
or
"turd?"

Those aren't the words
that do give me pain.
The word I am pondering
is
"Orangutang."

Why is it that
it's making me laugh?
Probably because
it represents gaff.

I mean, check it out,
it has many uses.
Usually referring to things that are gooses.

Such as an idea,
that wasn't too good.
They become
the Gorilla
that's lives in your hood.

But wait,
now I'm saying
"Gorilla" instead?
Oh this is starting to mess with my head!

"Gorilla," a funny word
in of itself!
It's not a Monkey you put
on your shelf

But wait?
I said "Monkey?"
Oh no, not again?
How many Chimpanzees
can one poem stand?

I'll just have to face it
I'm so very crass,
and realize
I sound like
a big "Baboon's" ass...

Your smile...

I want you to know that
it's all okay.
I won't leave you now,
No how, no way.

It's great when you laugh
and I love your smile.
That's why,
I'm not going too far
for awhile. 

I know it's been tough
and things seem so wrong.
But all of our problems?
They won't last for long.

We both must have faith
that things will work out.
And that we'll have fun things
to talk about.

So please don't worry
I'll keep up the pace,
and work to keep putting
a smile on your face.

Mondays vs. Fridays

Everybody hates Mondays.
Well, I don't.
Everybody loves Fridays.
Well, I don't.

Monday is the day I was born.
Friday is the day everyone is gone.

On Mondays, the news is fresh.
Everybody has stories about
what they did on the weekend.

On Fridays, the news is stale.
Everybody wants me to tell them
what my plans are for the weekend.
Usually,
I have none.

I hate Fridays.
Thank God for Monday.

Stay tuned

I've got a new plan
that will truly delight
It will make many smile
but bring joy and spite!

So sit down, relax
and take a good seat
You don't want to miss this,
It'll be really neat!